2019 - 14 March - Check In #zentriathlete

Temple Hill in Logan, Utah - hill work capture - 5 k of hill repeats. done!

Checkin' IN!!!

Well it's been a few weeks and I have been mostly consistent in my training. My swims are great. My riding has been moderate to weak. When I can find time to pedal for 30 -60 minutes it has been solid. My runs are coming back. I am not pushing my runs at all and letting things happen in the run slow to run fast manner of thinking.

I posed a Facebook question to a Utah based group called Run4Fun. The question was spawned from a recent podcast and discussion from Crushing Iron (C26) where Robbie and Mike spoke about and explored the concept of building genuine confidence:

On March 12 -

So, after my run tonight I hit the pool, and as I was a little fatigued, a thought came to me while swimming and I pose the question here as a conversation starter.
Where does the root of your confidence in running (or multisporting) really come from?

This was my response and as a note many others shared, but those are theirs and here is mine:

This is an interesting topic that was explored in a podcast I follow for multipsort (more endurance and triathlon related) and felt it a very compelling and thought provoking question. I've addressed this topic in different ways on my personal blog.
For me confidence has ebbed and flowed. For example in high school and college sports, I gained confidence in repetition - practice, fundamental learning and application and it was in the consistent application and practice I gained incremental confidence. Sounds like growth mindset. Then fast forward, life, choice, marriage, kids, professional life, I forgot me and rediscovered me.
Now confidence is similar, but creating the repetition and ability to practice/train is not always available. And that is OK but it affects my confidence. I was when I first returned to activity in 2013 very evidence based, chasing PR's and making sure EVERYONE knew that I was BIGGER than them, for that I apologize. I was excited and projecting my lack of confidence. Now I am more quiet and understand that my confidence is driven and influenced by my motivation and my motivation can impact confidence and vice versa. Let me be clear, I do feel and am seeing for me that confidence and motivation ARE NOT the same thing.

Anyway, my confidence is not affected by others outcomes mainly, it is how I perceive me and compare me to me. Sometimes, I fall into the but when I was younger I could do this. I have to stop, re-frame my confidence and expectations and ultimately rethink what it should be given all factors NOW.
I find, for me, this maturity or growth, drives confidence too. I can see that I can cope through my confidence deficits and conversely control my over confidence - both can lead to destructive thought or decisions in training - injury - physical and mental is often the end result - for me.

Many other things are going on. We decided to put in some trim work and baseboards into our home over the weekend and while doing that, it's been a bit over a year that we moved, which just was the correct and right change for our family, but its taken us a while to hit our groove. It took me a while to get the floors in and then negotiate a lot of family and other things.

26 Mar 2019 -- It is now two weeks from the original post and I just want to get it out there. This is probably incomplete, but taking it as it is. Cheers!